• explored 3 national parks
• wrote 100 posts to my blog
• took in a puppy roommate
• ran 3 more half marathons
• befriended a dozen new friends
• volunteered at the Rescue Mission
• learned fix-it tricks
• found a new seat in a new church
• discovered podcasts
• followed current politics

without Bill.

Would he know me?  I’ve tried and done or tried and failed a zillion new things.  Some want to’s.  Some have to’s.  But all tried to’s.  Each one has changed me a bit of a bit.   Am I still the person he knows?

I drive highways now.  I pay bills now.  I meet people now.  I fix the ice machine now.  I see beautiful new landscapes now.  Would he know me?  Would he still choose this changed, take-a-chance, independent, step-my-big-toe-out-the-door, Kath?

I still make the bed.  I still plain myself up for the day.  I still eat salads and oatmeal and grapes.  I still sit in the same chair.  I still say ding dong things.  I still yell at scores.  I still watch our favorite series.

I think I still do the same do’s more than I’ve tried the new do’s.  I think he would still know me.  It comforts me to think, that though I’ve changed, he would still know me, like me, choose me.

One thing is sure.  Everyday I know him, like him.  Everyday I would still choose Bill.

(I think I’ve wondered about this wonder a few times.  I just looked back at posts, and sure enough, there’s the same wonder.  It must be a deep one.  It must be an all-the-time one.  It must be an it-matters one.  It must be.)